She's making me a better version of me. I am all of the sudden super aware of what kind of woman I am in all aspects of my life. I guess having a little girl around watching and questioning your every move will do that to you. We did yoga tonight before bed...not because I particularly felt like it but more because she questioned why I had yoga mats if I didn't even use them. I didn't have a good answer and she wanted to do yoga and so we did. It was lovely. After that we each opened a book and read until our eyes were heavy. That was my idea and not because I always read before bed, but because I know I should...and I know she should...and I know if I do...she will. There's been a ton of these same scenarios in the past week. I can't really remember ever being so aware of how I care for myself. Teaching her has opened a window into me. Chasing little boys around for the past few years and crashing into bed at the end of each day has been a mountain of fun. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but raising a lady, well, that's something special for us both.
We've talked a lot this week about her interests and what she might want to get involved with. My heart is happy to announce that she decided she wants to be a ballerina. We bought her a leotard and tights today. I asked her to try it on once we got home so we could make sure it fit. It was adorable and I tried really hard not to squeel with excitement when she popped out in that black and pink looking all precious. I asked if I could take her picture and she rolled her eyes ...cause...uhh... that's just ridiculous that I would want a picture of that. She tried to pretend she wasn't excited. She was though. She wouldn't take it off. She wore them all evening.
She's smart and witty. She's a little bit shy when she meets new people and a little bit over the top once she warms up. She talks back a lot more than I like but speaks and listens with her heart when we talk about the serious things. She knows a lot about a lot and yet she's held on to some sweet innocence through it all.
She's trying hard to be a good big sister but it's so new. She's learning about her baby brother and is quick to tell other people about him as if she's known him all along. Her patience runs out quickly some days. "Why does he cry so much?" "Tell him to stop touching my things!" "Ugh, I can't wait til my room is finished cause he's NOT allowed in there." Most of the time though it's giggles between them, funny faces in the back seat as we make our way through town, chasing each other through the house and snuggles on the couch.
He's learning too. Sharing "your person" isn't easy when you've never had to. When I brush her hair, or she lays across my lap, he looks so betrayed and cries the saddest cry I've ever heard. Each day has seemed a little easier on him and it melts my heart to watch them learn about each other and begin forming the bond that belongs between siblings.
I've lost count of what chapter this is in my book of life, but I can tell you that I can't wait to turn the page each day. It's a beautiful story that's being written. A story of siblings brought together. A story of love and hope. ❤💙
