It's been awhile... yeah. Raising 3 is no walk in the park. I told someone today I'm crazy for taking this on "alone" but when I look back, I know the only answer was yes.
We got really good news today and we are one step closer to adoption for little sis. As I sit here and think about officially becoming a single mom of 3, I can't help but reflect on how far I've come. I remember making choices...many of them...many years ago...with the thought in mind that it really didn't matter because I wasn't going to have kids, my marriage had failed, and I figured I'd end up old and alone. It seems so dramatic looking back but seriously it's what I believed.
When Abram came I was sort of like the Grinch...my heart grew three sizes that day. Little did I know that there were two precious girls waiting to fill the other two thirds.
I couldn't honestly tell anyone that this was an easy path. It's been so hard. So exhausting. It's definitely aged me. But these 3... they are worth it all. I went to parent teacher conferences this week and listened to Abram's teacher talk about him being a leader and easily making friends (talking too much but of course that's no surprise!) He's smart and funny and basically thriving as a 6 yr old spoiled rotten, sensitive, soft hearted, bratty, Pokémon collecting little boy.
Savannah's teachers talked about how smart she is and what a pleasure she is to have in class. We ended up spending most of our time talking to her archery coach and he went on and on about what and elite archer she is. I take very little credit for who she is. Sure I give her what she needs and love her like crazy. I give tough love when I need to but she came to me resilient and determined. I've watched her blossom into this young lady that's going to be a force in the world. Mark my words.
Then there's Baby K! I went to pick her up from daycare this week and she attempted to climb the fence to get to me. By the time I made it to the gate, her boot was caught underneath and it took 3 of us to get her out. Bless her teacher's heart I could tell it had been a day and believe me I understand. She's recreating threenager on a whole new level. She loves me fiercely and doesn't wanna ever spend a night away from momma. It took Abram past age 4 to spend the night at Lollie and Pop's. I'll be lucky if she'll stay before Junior High. She's sassy and smart like her big sister and for sure plans to leave her mark on the world.
Then there's me. Still teaching and loving my students every day as if they're my own... because in the hours they're with me they are! I don't see myself ever leaving education but I'm also opening my heart to some small changes that might be possible in the near future. I'm single and probably too stubborn to co-parent so it is what it is but if you think you have the perfect match and you're willing to keep my rowdy kids for the night, let me know! I'll accept a night out. Lol.
I'm blessed and stressed and a really hot mess but I really love my kids and I really love me.
As always, thanks to our balcony people who keep cheering us on. We love you big and we appreciate you.
🙏❤🩵💜
