Workin' Momma

As I sit here at home again, for what feels like the 100th time this school year, I am reflecting on just how hard it is to be a single, working momma. Pink eye is today's culprit. This definitely beats the hell out of puking, diarrhea, or high fever. Other than wrestling Little to put the drops in, this is looking to be a relaxing day of toons and giggles. There is though a part of me, across town, wondering about my school kids. There's also a little kindergarten boy who consumes most of my thought time lately. This is the hard part....

How can we be present and in the moment when we have so many responsibilities, concerns, and cares? Every school day when I drop my boys at daycare, I begin to think about their day. Are they dressed warm enough? Will they burn up in that long sleeve shirt when the day decides to warm up? Will I get called because one of them got sick or because they are just having a really rough day? I think about them constantly. After making it through the morning, I start to think about our after school schedule. What time is therapy? What can we have for dinner that they might actually eat? I have always taken great pride in the teacher that I am,but I feel like this year, I've been less. Please don't get me wrong. I'm sure my school family still knows how loved they are. I've still covered all my standards and done my very best to prepare each of them for life, state testing, and 4th grade. But in my heart, I know that this group didn't get all of me in the ways that the past 10 years worth of kiddos have.

Here's the kicker though...God knew all of these things. He knew that about Christmas time I would begin to question if could actually handle this pressure. So guess what. He was two steps ahead. He sent me a student teacher. She's stepped up, with a heart of gold, for my school kids and become part of our school family.  She's been so much more than I could have hoped for. She's also become my friend. God knew that those planning periods needed to be for grading but also for good ol heart to hearts. We've shared tears and lots of good healing laughs. I will forever be grateful for her and all she's meant during this season of life.

Here's what I've learned, workin mommas....A little faith goes a long way. Don't doubt that God will show up and show out when we need it most. When you are completely exhausted, pulled in a million directions and just feel like you're not enough in each area of your life, He sees you. God will send us what we need. Did I and do I still struggle? Absolutely! I want to be able to control my life. I want to be responsible and give 100% at work and at home. This is a tough gig but know you're not alone. I'm sure most of us feel the same.I know I'm not judging you when you have to call in...again. . I'm just looking at you with compassion, knowing the struggle you feel.

Let's do our best to live in the moment. Let's pour the love we have into those we care for at home and in our daily careers. Let's remember when we're home with sick babies that the world keeps turning without us and we're right where we need to be. So for now, I'm going to wish I had a couple extra arms to hold this baby while I, against his will, gently place two drops in each eye. Then, I'm going to cuddle, play, and live in the moment because life is short and our days are numbered. Lots of love!